HOW TO BECOME A GODDAMN MAGICIAN
1. OWN A TABLET PEN
2. PUT IT DOWN FOR TEN SECONDS
3. ABRACADABRA WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO
never have I laughed so hard
TODAY I WATCHED A WHITE WOMAN AND HER FRIEND BUY AND EAT A TAMALE WITH THE CORN HUSK STILL ON IT AND THEY HAD THAT FORCED UNCOMFORTABLE SMILE LIKE WHEN U EATIN SOMETHIN REALLY UNDESIRABLE BT DON’T WANNA OFFEND THE COOK SO U JUS TRY AND GRIN THRU IT AND I WAS CACKLING white people are gettin wild in 2014 truly
A muggleborn and pureblood couple having their first child and the pureblood not knowing about ultrasounds so they don’t understand why their partner is dragging them to a muggle doctor until they get there and suddenly they see a physical picture of their newborn child and hear it’s little heartbeat and it’s better than any magic they’ve ever seen.